Parenting
Tips on Discipline
David B. Seaburn, PhD
- Threats don’t work; they teach your child that you don’t mean what you say.
- Discipline when you are calm; don’t be reactive; be planful.
- Don’t over do it; long disciplines (you’re grounded until next year!) usually lead to more battles and conflict.
- Children who can engage you in ongoing discussion (or arguments) about a behavior often win (and don’t face consequences!).
- Be sure that you can be in charge of the discipline; do not expect your child to discipline themselves (“Before I get home I want you to have all the chores done.”)
- Shorter, clearer more well defined discipline often works better because your child learns that you mean it and you can do it.
- Problem behaviors that are repeated need a plan; tell your child what the plan is before you institute it; the plan should include: Target behavior; expected behavior; consequence and how it will be delivered; reward (non-monetary if possible) if your child is successful.
- If there are 2 parents or parental figures in the house, it helps if they are in agreement; two parents who agree are stronger than any one child; one child is stronger than two parents that disagree.
- If parents don’t agree, make a different plan; or, agree that one will take the lead and the other won’t interfere.
- Parents who disagree in front of their children are teaching their children that they don’t have to pay attention to either parent (or other adults).
- Research shows that corporal punishment runs the risk of increasing behavior problems as the child gets older.
- Children need parents who are friendly, not parents who are their friends.
- Giving children responsibilities rather than punishments helps them mature.
ONLINE RESOURCES
 American Academy of Pediatrics |
provides general child health information and more specific guidelines concerning a pediatric issue. |
| Child Development Institute Parenting Today | provides parents information on child development, child psychology, parenting, health and learning. |
| Empowering Parents | provides parenting support and resources to address your child’s behavioral concerns. |
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connects families to community resources and events. |
| Kids Health | a wonderful website with information about health, behaviorand development from before birth through teen years. |
| Kaboose | is the premier family and parenting destination with kids’ crafts, holiday fun and activities, healthy food recipes, free online games. |
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provides a wealth of resources for schools, districts, educators, parents, and public school advocates working to raise achievement for all students in the middle grades. |
| Netsmartz Internet Safety Guide | for Parents |
| PBS Parents | will expand your collection of parenting resources. |
 Kids Out and About |
Rochester, NY premiere resource guide to local family events and activities. |
| Mental Health Associates |
family support services/family education |
| Absences Add Up | great information about the impact of absence |
Page Last Updated on December 17, 2017